Clearing My Head in Big Bend
On my fifth trip to West Texas, a brief excursion in October 2023, I returned from a three-month journey through South America, exploring Peru, Argentina, and Chile. Initially planning to relocate to San Antonio with my parents, our plans shifted, leading me back to Austin. Alongside this transition, I navigated the end of a six-year relationship. Upon my return to Austin, I found a place to live in a spare bedroom of a couple I connected with on Craigslist. Little did I know, this arrangement would become my home for the next three years.


Battling tonsillitis and bronchitis upon my South American return, I found myself bedridden for several days. During this tumultuous time, fate intervened in an unexpected Uber encounter, leading me to meet the love of my life. Inspired by a need for solace and reflection, I embarked on a solo journey to Big Bend National Park that same week. Although my South American travels provided ample introspection, I sought familiarity in the vast expanse of West Texas. There, beneath the mesmerizing Milky Way, and immersed in the soothing waters of a hot spring, I found the peace of mind I longed for.

To be honest, I felt lonely. I craved company to share this memory with. Solitude weighed heavy on me. Part of me entertained the idea of inviting the Uber guy, but it seemed too soon for a road trip with someone I had just met. As I explored the area, capturing moments with my camera, I found myself amidst the famous chili cookoff in Terlingua, invited to a local desert party where acid was offered. However, the thought of indulging in drugs alone in the desert felt like a terrible idea. During my night ventures, I clumsily injured myself by falling into a cactus and bumping my nose on a pole, all while sober.

The next day, I encountered another challenge as I got a flat tire in the middle of the desert. Despite these mishaps, I pressed on and hiked up to Emory Peak in Big Bend National Park, feeling overwhelmed by loneliness and sadness.

By 9 PM, after completing my hike, a sudden impulse struck me. Originally planning to spend the night in my tent, I made a spontaneous decision to return to Austin. Driving through the night, I arrived home around 5 AM. Looking back, if I hadn’t acted on that impulse, I might never have gone on a second date with the mysterious Uber guy (funnily enough, I was his driver, not the other way around), and who knows if we would have ever pursued further dates. My life could have taken a completely different path.
So, despite the underwhelming nature of the trip, I’m grateful that I trusted my instincts and followed through. It was a journey filled with unexpected twists and turns, ultimately leading to serendipitous moments that altered the course of my life.
